Sept. 15, 2002
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Mindekirken Sept. 15, 2002 Forgiveness Matthew 18:21-35 My friend Jon Lotterud of Gjøvik has written a song called "Two hands." It’s about distance between spouses, forgiveness and a new start. It’s not always easy to admit one’s failures with words. Sometimes it may be felt easier to say "forgive me," with hands seeking the other in having it out and reconciliation. Nothing is as good as falling asleep at night knowing that disagreement is left behind. Have you felt hands, eyes or words saying "forgive me?" Have you felt warmth and closeness come back after coldness, rejection and distance in a relationship? Forgiveness is one of the most beautiful ties between people. It opens to love and goodness. With forgiveness we grow as humans. To be able to forgive is a characteristic that mirrors God’s personality. That’s what Jesus teaches us today. Peter knew he was on the track of something important when he brought forth the theme "forgiveness." He himself had felt the forgiveness as a surging power in his life that day when Jesus called him to become a disciple. Do you remember the enormous catch of fish he had at the Sea of Galilee? (Luke 5) Peter got the feeling that he had met the Son of God and he didn’t feel good: "Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!" But Jesus didn’t go. He lifted Peter up, forgave his sins and let him taste the changing power of love. To be a disciple of Jesus is to be at a school where love, forgiveness and goodness is on the timetable, not as theory but daily exercise. "Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?" Peter felt generous when he said it, because he so many times had heard the scribes say one should forgive three times. But Jesus said it shouldn’t stop there. "Not seven times, but seventy-seven times", or seven by seventy times as the Norwegian Bible translates. Anyway, one should forgive unlimited times. Don’t be a stingy bookkeeper who keeps account of how many times one forgives, as if forgiveness was a matter of quota. Why not? Because God himself is generous in his forgiveness. When you come the 489th time (or 76th) to ask for forgiveness for the same sin we wouldn’t hear that there’s only one time left before it’s the end. Do you know what God says? He would ask you what you’re talking about. The sin you confess the 100th time is brand new to God. Every time we ask for forgiveness, he throws our sins behind his back (Isaiah 38:17) One has said that God sinks our sins in the ocean of forgiveness, and there is a sign saying "No fishing" there. And that’s what God respects. Then we should try to do the same even if we may have a bad conscience. God forgives because he is love. But that doesn’t mean that God tolerates everything. God is holy, he can’t stand sin. The 10 commandments teach us that God demands perfection of us. Forgiveness is not to minimize the immoral, it’s not to mystify the question of right and wrong. If there had been only one human who had done one single sin one time, it would have caused Christ to come and die on the cross. Forgiveness cost God everything. We read about the slave who owed the king ten thousand talents. That was like a national budget, and of course totally out of range of that poor slave. Even so, he was forgiven. That’s how God is. He is radical and limitless when it comes to forgiveness, and he sets us free. We can’t think big enough of what happened in our baptism, at communion or at confession when we receive the words of absolution. A limitless forgiveness rests upon us. But do we act like the slave in the parable? He met his fellow slave at the next corner and almost killed him to get back money that was owed him. What a paradox, he who had been met with warmth and forgiveness was cold and irreconcilable against his neighbor. His stinginess stands in a screaming contrast to the generosity of the king. Jesus warns us about closing our hearts to the ones who need our understanding and goodness. "You must be goodhearted as your Father in heaven is goodhearted," Jesus said. We should take after our heavenly Father. Satisfy your mind by his goodness. There’s enough injustice in life. But the one who focuses on his own disaster nourishes self-pity and bitterness. It absorbs joy and strength from life. Humans who can’t forgive make it hard to live for oneself and for others. Now it’s easier to talk about forgiveness than actually do it. If one has been exposed to people who really have damaged things in one’s life, there might be several rounds to go with oneself and God. It’s a good thing that the Bible teaches us that we don’t have to put a cover over our negative feelings. Especially in the book of Psalms we read about people who pour out their pain, cursing and thoughts of revenge in their prayers to God. God knows us. We don’t need to censor our feelings to him. He can take our outbreaks. To forgive demands a lot of our character development. It’s about humbleness. Maybe we need to pray: "God, I can’t manage to forgive, but even so give me the will to do it." It’s not to let others trample upon us. If, for instance, one has been rudely back-bitten, to forgive doesn’t mean to agree with the untrue things that have been said. Forgiveness is not to minimize or accept things that are wrong. "The truth will make you free" Jesus said, John 8:32. Forgiveness demands truth, settlement, and then reconciliation. In this way, we have a round to go with ourselves and God. We must not let bitterness grow in our hearts. But what about the second round, should we go to the evildoer and forgive him if he doesn’t admit to have done anything wrong? What does it mean that Jesus asks us to love our enemies and pray for the ones who mistreat us? (Matthew 5:44) Dutch woman Corrie Ten Boom was in a German prison during the war because she and her family had helped Jews. At the concentration camp, there was especially one who treated the prisoners badly. Corrie’s sister died from the mistreatment. After the war, Corrie had a meeting where she spoke of God’s love. When the meeting was over, a man came forward and said to her: "Isn’t it wonderful with the forgiveness of God?" Before she got to say yes, she realized that the man was the one who had mistreated her at the camp. He didn’t recognize her. But Corrie felt immediately how hurting memories of the nazi imprisonment came up in her. She felt pain, degradation and bitterness pressing on. Should she give up and let it all come out right in front of him? But as in a flash of light she got help to be reminded of the grace of God. Without showing anything she answered the man: "Yes, it’s fantastic with the forgiveness of God." "The one who has been forgiven much, loves much," Jesus said. One of the most difficult things may be to forgive oneself. One may have made decisive choices. One may be the victim of circumstances that make it difficult to reconcile with life. Some have to live with handicaps. I have often been astounded to see the joy of life and the gratitude by people that life has been hard for. "Teach us to count our days so that we may find wisdom in our hearts" the psalm says. Maybe the wisdom of the heart is the grateful mind, the totally confident attitude that we read about in Romans today: "If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord." Life is a gift, and to know the giver is the greatest thing of all. Glory be to God, the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit, one true God now and forever. Amen
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