September 5, 2004

Mindekirken, Sept. 5, 2004

Pastor Jens Arne Dale

Luke 14.25-33

When I was confirmed, I got a nice Bible from my parents. The translation which was used at that time, was from 1930. Today’s text in that Bible read: Whoever comes to me and does not hate father or mother, wife or children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple. I remember marking this verse with a red line, but it was hardly because I liked it. Does Jesus really think that we should hate our closest family?

I think today’s Norwegian translation interprets Jesus’ meaning well: It’s all about putting Jesus before father and mother. Having said that, the Greek verb miseo does mean to hate. Jesus intended to say something shocking. He put it on the edge in a way that makes this one of the impossible expressions. It sounds like what Jesus said in the sermon on the mount when he told us to tear out our eye in case we were tempted. And if your hand tempts you to sin, cut it off… Expressions like these are not literally meant, and whenever a Christian leader claims it’s supposed to be done literally, it ends tragically.

Marit, let’s call her that, was a teenager when she got in touch with a Christian fellowship where faith and love seemed to be burning. She was embraced by open arms, and soon she spent all her time in the fellowship. But what began with care and love, soon turned into control and demand to endure subjection. The strong leader of the fellowship criticized Marit for a lot of things she did. She was forced to confess sin in front of everybody, and humiliated in different ways. Her self-respect was torn apart, and she got into a sick relationship of dependence to the strong leader. In this connection, today’s Bible verse about hating our parents was used, or we may say misused, to reduce Marit to a zero. She was nothing in herself, she was totally at the mercy of the leader who was more or less psychopathic. For Marit, the break away from the fellowship was the beginning of a long way towards regaining psychical health. But still her self-esteem is low after years of mental infringements. Encounters with Christian pastors and leaders are difficult, but she has maintained a basic trust in God’s goodness.

The story of Marit may be a different one than the story of your life. But reading Jesus’ words today that we’re supposed to hate our parents, it’s worth warning against those who take Bible verses like these literally in order to gain control over the spiritual life of others. It easily ends wrong when religion is lived in a fanatic way. Fundamentalism is dangerous whatever suit it wears. By fundamentalism I think of those who capture a religion in order to use it for their own purposes. Fundamentalism claims absolute power, and it can’t adjust to the rules of democracy. We have seen Islamic fundamentalism where hate and terror have been ethically accepted. We have seen political fundamentalism in the totalitarian ideologies. And we know that Christianity several times has been misused to suppress others.

How should we understand Jesus’ words about hating our parents? The context in which it is said is important. Jesus was on his way to Jerusalem, to his death on the cross. He was surrounded by people who saw the way to Jerusalem as a march in triumph where Jesus would ultimately establish his kingdom. They expected an empire. Jesus knew it would be quite different. Therefore he uses strong words to avoid them following him on wrong premises. It was not power and glory that waited the ones who would follow him, but sacrifice and suffering. The one who would follow Jesus has to put the discipleship before family and possessions.

Even so, to hate is not literally meant. If that was the case, everything the Bible says elsewhere about loving each other would be set aside. It’s all about right priorities. Ultimately it’s about the first commandment. You shall have no other gods. God wants the first place in our lives.

At the time of Jesus, they knew about people who carried their cross. Everyone had seen people who had been sentenced to death. They were forced to carry their own crosses to the execution place. For them, possessions were not interesting any more. The relationship with the closest ones was coming to an end. They would be separated in a few hours. Death would make it impossible to bring anything along. There are excavations from pagan times of Vikings who were buried with a lot of goods and gold they supposedly would need in the afterlife. We have read about Hindu customs where a widow would be burnt together with her husband in order to follow him to life on the other side. But the Bible teaches us that we can’t take anything with us where we are going. Death separates in a final way. One relationship will survive death; the fellowship with him who has gone through death and the grave for us.

Jesus was on his way towards suffering. He once and for all would die on the cross for the sin of mankind. We shall not suffer for our sins. To take up one’s cross and follow Jesus is to be united with him through baptism. In baptism we’re marked with the cross as a testimony that we should belong to the crucified and resurrected Jesus Christ and believe in him. We die and rise with Christ through our baptism, Paul says in Rom 6.5. We are rescued from the power of darkness and transferred into the kingdom of his beloved son, Col 1.13. To be baptized means to have a new relationship to possessions and family, things we enjoy. A disciple of Jesus Christ belongs to the kingdom of God. Death has lost it’s power over us, because it’s behind us. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live. John 11.25 Marked with the sign of the cross. We don’t live for ourselves any more, but for Christ. Everything in life comes in a new perspective.

A man dreamt he would buy the kingdom of God. God told him the price was high. It costs everything. The man was willing to invest everything he had in the bank in order to buy the kingdom of God. But it costs more, God said. You have to sell your house. But then I have to live in my RV, the man complained. That doesn’t matter, God said, it also has to be sold. But what about my wife and my children? The man said. They also have to be sold. But then I have nothing left, the man said desperately. No problem, God said, you too must be sold in order for you to be able to buy the kingdom of God. And then comes the moral at the end of the story. God said: I don’t really think that I can use these things. But you can use them for me. Do that, but remember they all belong to me and you use them on behalf of me.

So therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give up all your possessions, Jesus says today. But the one who gives all to Jesus, gets everything back. In this context Jesus is prior to father and mother, wife or children, brothers and sisters. But the one who belongs to Jesus, is also called to love one’s nearest. When Jesus is in the first place in our lives, we are free to love and serve others.

Jesus also talked about someone who would build a tower, but couldn’t afford to finish it, and the king who asked for peace when he considered he couldn’t win a war. Both examples are about firm calculation. We don’t manage to do the works good enough for our own salvation. But we surrender to him who has completed it for us. It’s no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Gal 2.20

Glory be to God, the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, one true God, now and for ever. Amen.

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